The music at Hudsons Burger Joint in Stellenbosch vibrates through the air as statuesque, lily-white skinned MC van Coller (25) bounces up to the high seated, roadside table. He removes his khaki jacket and innovatively drapes it over the table railing. He plunks himself onto the high chair and his eyes dart for the menu as he announces his hung-over state.
“I left work yesterday and then I realised there was a big jol at my work and it was like,” his head whips around toward the road where a loud engined car screeches by, “did you see how big that guy’s penis was,” he comments.
His chest shakes from chuckling, he continues, “I just dropped in there got pretty tipsy, got home and when I got home I passed out and slept for like two hours. Viwe phoned me and she was like, ‘do you wanna go dancing?’ I was like fuck yeah I wanna go dancing.”
KFC has become a regular after a night out, “I feel like such a fatty,” he exclaims.
The drinks arrive and he swiftly raises the glistening beer glass to his lips closing his eyes as he sips.
He may be nursing a hangover but he’s overcome worse from discovering his identity to completing his Master’s degree with very little assistance.
Another sip of cold beer and he straightens his back, easing into the seat.
The beginning of self-discovery
Van Coller spent the first part of his primary school days in Secunda where he received South African colours for athletics and was a ‘golden boy’ as he terms it.
Afterwards moving to Mossel Bay he attended both primary and high school in Hartenbos where he met two of his closest friends, and one such, Wilhelm, would later start the first musical project, Audio Reign, together.
“We all just went to Stellenbosch afterwards. High school was cool, but I was bullied a lot because I was tall and pale,” he giggles hysterically as he remembers what he calls an “average” experience.
But he was holding back a part of himself.
“I was coming to terms with homosexuality and all that shit,” he admits, “Being there and being in a changing room seeing like the first team rugby undressing and being like ‘oh shit’, the whole coming to terms with it happened there in high school.”
He rearranges the positioning of his cap and talks intimately about what he terms his gay origin story, “My coming out story was kind of weird as I was planning on telling my parents in my fourth year, it was in test week and my mom phoned me. She said a family friend of ours said that she thinks that I’m a homosexual.”
His mother wondered whether it was true and he responded, “It’s not her business, I was ramping up to telling you guys this but yes it’s true.”
It’s better that he wasn’t there when it happened he says, but it forced him to facilitate a conversation.
“I made three main points; it’s not a phase, it’s not your fault and it’s not going to change. I made sure those three things were what they would take to heart.”
“Coming out is so gay,” he jokingly concludes, “doing the most for your coming out story, that’s a bit gay,” he looks down as he removes his cap and starts swiping the table with it.
“I’m not going to make a public spectacle of myself, but if you ask me I won’t deny it.”
Having been raised in an Afrikaans conservative family he says made it hard for him to express his sexuality as there was also no one to speak to about his inner turmoil.
Turmoil to love affair
Waving to a friend walking by with great long arms, he mentions the toll his inadequacies took on the relationship with his father.
“I was not the Afrikaans ‘boer-seuntjie’ that he wanted as a son to play rugby. I was more just into music and making music. Whenever there was trouble I would lock myself in my room play guitar and write songs.”
He sips slowly on his now nearly empty beer, “finding a way to release that pent up stuff I had, was a good release for it and it was a good way to channel my negative and positive emotions into something that you can create.”
The band Dope Folks fronted by van Coller recently released their EP and people in the industry are taking note, “It’s gotten to the point where people are recruiting us for shows.”
“There’s a gay man up in every industry so that has helped with networking.”
With no formal music training, he used YouTube and a DVD to learn the basics of writing music, “technically I’m not very proficient when it comes to writing songs, but I feel I have a knack for what’s catchy and conveying my emotions through music and lyrics.”
“What makes Dope Folks cool is that they’re all trained musicians,” he mentions as his mouth tugs into a smile that Alexander Burger, the drummer, played in the orchestra, Don Schriefer completed courses at the conserve and Sebastian Dorrington has grade 8 in guitar.
“I think from starting Dope Folks to now, I have become a much better musician by just having to practice and being around very prolific and proficient musicians.”
Slaying a degree
Besides creating a band in his 5th year of study he also started his MSc in Industrial Engineering.
“I wasn’t planning on doing master’s but then I got a bursary,” he says as he talks about his master’s project which was in additive manufacturing 3D printing.
He lets out a huge breath of air and leans back, “It was almost impossible to get my master’s because of mismanagement in the Industrial Engineering faculty and experimental delays.”
“You have to either do research papers or coursework. I couldn’t do the research papers because they took too long with the experiments, so I decided to do coursework online. “
He completed the coursework and finished his master’s which was read by his supervisor once. In the week of submission he handed in his coursework results and the faculty told him they don’t recognise the course work as valid.
He shakes his head, “I was shitting my pants and then I sent them the emails that I got from my supervisor. “
The supervisor had approved it but never clarified with the faculty. The faculty then advised him to write a research paper to be submitted two weeks after his master’s submission if he wants his master’s to be considered.
Without much feedback and being the only one to fully read his master’s and research paper he says he submitted it all with a sense of dread building in his stomach.
“I thought I’m a fraud and I had serious imposter syndrome, thinking everything I wrote is so stuffed up, no one told me this is fine.”
To his surprise, he received a cum laude for his master’s submission which he says is something he really was not expecting.
He happily picks up his beer to cheers his success, “It was unreal, and I didn’t know how to react or process the emotion.”
Through all of this, his parents have always worried about his split focus, “I will always do music, and I will always pursue it in some way. I’m going to be an engineer and I will do my best that I can there but it will always be an outlet for music.”
Even though his parents are worried he says he doesn’t want to stagnate and that he really wants to do something with his life.
In the future he envisions more music, pursuing more overseas travels to as he says, escaping the very small South African community.
He would like to possibly further his studies or work overseas he says.
“I can’t really get a job in something that I did my master’s in because the only industry for additive manufacturing and 3D printing in South Africa is in academia and I don’t want to be in academia. I want to work and I want to go overseas because if you go overseas there’s a lot of industries that actually practice and create things.”